Tuesday, May 31, 2005

Demonia (1990) Lucio Fulci

Demonia is thought by many to be Fulci's worst film because it's uninspired and way low budget with a hazy/slightly blurred look to it. The gore effects are the saving grace, that, and the camera movement in and out, this way and that - if you like that sort of thing, and I do.

Demonia - bootleg tape

gore spoilers...

tongue nailed to block - by ghost

upside down man ripped in half by ropes tied to two trees (à la in Cut and Run) in front of his own child (a bonus)

women mauled by cats - clearly puppet effects - eyes pop

If I got the details wrong, that's sad, because I only watched it three weeks ago. I was holding off, waiting for a Cub Speaks, but since she slept through the second half of the movie and is now out of town, we don't get one.

So I've watched a bunch of movies lately. Well parts of a bunch of movies, or movies divided up into several sittings. This week has finally allowed for me to have some stretches of free time, which are being eaten by myspace, more on that later.

I've got a big bag of DVDs that I got as promos and the most represented company in the batch would be Troma. The quality of these reissues varies greatly. I'm not talking technical specs, I mean they are either good or they suck. Fatty Drives the Bus will not be put back into my DVD player. As for the South African Pure Blood, about white supremacist zombies, I'll never see the action scenes where it becomes Dead Alive, the movie it obviously wants to be.

I'm working on Mad Dog Morgan, a seventies action film with Dennis Hopper as an Irish bandit in 1850's Australia. It is watchable and I'll finish it tonight. For some reason this DVD and a bunch of the other Troma discs include a pair of Peta2 shorts telling viewers to go vegetarian. Of course, if you know me, I approve of the message. I could not get through Meet Your Meat, which is made up of clips of animals being slaughtered. I excused myself because I'm already vegan. The Goldfinger rock video included and advertised on the cover of some of the titles is all footage of animal death as well. If you told a kid at an Earth Crisis show in 1997 that Goldfinger would be the leading animal rights band from 2003-2005, they would think you were crazy - but they are and they probably have alienated a lot less people than Earth Crisis did.

I also have some titles from Synapse and No Shame Video, the latter which I had not heard of until now. They are introducing the Sergio Martino Collection, perhaps hoping fans will be confused and think they are buying something from the Dario Argento Collection. I know I slammed Sergio Martino before for the Slave of the Cannibal God's animal deaths, but I can still give him some critical praise. Case of the Scorpion's Tale, from the series, is one of the best giallos I've ever enjoyed, with some camera work that was completely different than anything I've ever seen.

Unrelated topic - myspace friendships with punk bands

I thought that when I joined I would never want to be 'friends' with any bands, especially ones made up by total strangers who's records I do not own. My resolve was further strengthened when first logging on I discovered that Audioslave had thousands of friends, many who thank the band personally 'for the ad'. Yeah right, it's the low level record label interns that they should be thanking.

Then I saw Pig Champion on someone else's profile. Fuck yeah I wanna be friends with him. And then then I saw the Angry Samoans, Hirax (with a huge amount of friends), and SFA (I did not know they were still around!) and of course I had to ad them too. Surely Metal Mike is running the Angry Samoans profile... we are not talking about the Foo Fighters here. We might not become pen pals, but at least these guys will read my messages.

So there is a middle ground, but it gets lame. I saw that Refused has a profile. Even in the tacky bio provided it says that they broke up. What good is it to be linked to them except to wear their icon as a badge of coolness on your profile? It's no good. Clearly their account was put up be someone from Epitaph or Victory who probably runs a bunch of profiles for defunct or even current bands. Why are the kids writing comments to Refused about how they were the best? What's more that band International Noise Conspiracy has the myspace.com/refused URL and discuss Refused there. What is the point of this Refused profile? Either to sell old records or for something totally different. Why there are 5 or 6 fake profiles of 18 Visions singer James Hart? People just like to pretend to be someone else. It's lame, I can't relate, I just want to be me.

Of course... if your intent in making a fake profile is to ridicule them... well I totally get that.

Sunday, May 29, 2005

Rats - Notte di terrore (1984)

This one took five sittings. It's from Bruno Mattei, who goes as Vincent Dawn. Not only does he borrow his name from Dawn of the Dead, he also borrows the Goblin soundtrack for his best known film, Night of the Zombies. He's made every type of exploitation film. Caligula films, nunsploitation, Emanuelle films, cannibal movies, nazi sex movies, and Porno Holocaust. Yeah, a lot of these are on my TO SEE list, but not his mondo films. Mattei thinks it's ok to kill animals in his movies. More on that later.

Rats - Night of Terror

The last ten seconds of Rats are really good. If you've got the video tape, the back and side of the box will spoil this ending for you. Hopefully the DVD case is more discreet. Up until the end, the movie is a total drag, with a few moments of interesting gore when rats bust out of the bodies of the dead and dying. Other than that, it's all painful dialogue, bad editing, and buckets of live rats being poured on the actors. Nothing about the rat attacks is convincing. They are clearly harmless, but that does not stop the cast and crew from kicking and killing a bunch of them for real on screen. Fuck all those pieces of shit.

I love Italian movies, but this is the worst one I've seen. I'm not just saying that because of the cruelty. It is slow and boring.

more shit:

I was down in the gym and one of the Blade movies was on TV. Real poor. Blade, Underworld, and Queen of the Damned will all be available in the upcoming Trenchcoat Mafia Collection that comes with a limited edition glow stick. Spencer Gifts is taking pre-orders for the true horror fans.

and this:

Film starlet Linnea Quigley is vegan. Here is the

Quigley has stared in a bunch of classics: Return of the Living Dead, Silent Night, Deadly Night, Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers, and Night of the Demons.

From what I read, this scream queen would never have worked on crap like Rats. She once reported a director to the Humane Society for allegations of animal cruelty on the set. Also she has rescued giant African rats - whatever those are.

She speaks out for the animals at horror conventions. Sadly she is not scheduled for the...

Fangoria convention in Burbank next weekend! Will it suck? Expect a whole report with the shit talk.

Thursday, May 26, 2005

3 Inches of Shit?

I did a little bit of research, nothing in depth. I'm not going to crucify the band for being friends with Hot Hot Heat, that really is not relevant. Friends are friends, you are lucky is you have any. What is relevant is the back ground vocals that do that metalcore/screamo thing of trailing the lead singer's words with an At the Gates-like growl. Every band does that today all the way on up to Hawthorne Heights. According to the press release 3 Inches of Blood are about pre-85 metal. Cool, but so are a lot of bands that don't get as much press because they've got less links to the trendy hardcore scene. It's plain as day that hardcore has hijacked heavy metal, at least on the Headbanger's Ball (only seen one episode) and in the metal magazines. I don't need to explain myself.

best record COVER of the year - from Ed Repka

from the 3 Inches of Blood press release:

Since inception, this purity of vision has earned the band critical acclaim in metal and alternative circles alike. Due to this bubbling under at the press level, Roadrunner Records took notice of the group's demo, and signed the band in 2004. "We're kind of in a weird position, considering the more modern leaning lineup of that label," says Hooper. "We're nu-metal's greatest enemies, so it's a weird juxtaposition for us. But let's just say that we fit in very well with their back catalogue - Annihilator, Pestilence, King Diamond, Suffocation. We're very pleased to be a part of that."

I like the quote, however, nu-metal is just plain dead so the claim is not too bold. The torch of shit has been passed on to the genre of metalcore. Could we ask this guy to say "We're metalcore's greatest enemies."? Or, are they metalcore sympathizers?

Fortunately, the lead vocals here are high pitched. It took my some time to place it, but at times the singing reminded me most of the guy from the stoner rock band Trouble. King Diamond comes to mind as well, though in a more generic form here. What I mean is that King Diamond's voice is more distinct.

I'm not going so far to say that this band is mocking metal, as some have speculated, in part because they toured with The Darkness. No, we live in a post-ironic age. It's impossible to be 100% true like those guys in Manowar. That band lives off the beaten path and was completely oblivious to an entire decade. The rest of us can't help but smile at some of the classical elements of metal. That does not mean that we don't love those elements and can't be genuinely moved by them. Anyway, 3 Inches of Blood said that metal was the best kind of music in the world, or something to that extent.

Well, this sure as fuck as not meant to be a puff piece on 3 Inches of Blood. I'm listening to the record now and not really digging it. Here are some metal bands I got promos of lately that are better than 3 Inches of Blood:

Rhapsody - have collaborated with Christopher Lee on record and on stage, but that is the album I don't have

Visions of Atlantis - symphonic, male and female vocals - love this one

Kamelot - power metal or progressive, something...

Korpiklaani - if Flogging Molly was a metal band... ok, that makes it sound awful, but this shit is great

Anyway, I don't really like bands official websites, too commercial, so there are no hyper links. I swear I'm not being lazy. If you are serious about looking for shit about these bands you will do a search anyway. Some of my friends have recently asked what bands I've been listening too lately. Well here you go. By the way, I really don't like the new Judas Priest, maybe the included DVD is good. Everything comes with extras these days. More for free, dual discs... That can't be bad, but for some reason I'm not bothering to celebrate.

It's funny, but I rarely ask friends for advice on what records to buy. I just grab whatever shit is cheapest in the bargain bin. That's been my way for some time now.

In conclusion, who gives a damn about the metal scene. Some of the power metal bands or pretty imaginative and I harbor no ill will towards their dorky fanbase, but the bulk of metal heads are shitty dudes who watch Faces of Death videos and jerk off to Suicide Girls, so fuck it.

warren returns to myspace

I'm back on myspace after a year of resistance. Besides using it to stay in touch, I'd like to meet people who read and write, make websites, or work on various projects, so send me a message if you enjoy my bloodbath horror blog and we can be friends.

my profile link -
http://www.myspace.com/16860887 - this makes me less anonymous when it comes to my posts, I've got to own up to all my controversial statements...

By the way, Cub, of 'Cub Speaks' fame, is on myspace as well. Her name is Joanna and she is the first or second person shown in everyone's friend box including mine. I don't know how she gets such good placement and neither does she. I'll do some research and see if it's random or if myspace can be manipulated in some way. Anyway, to be her friend you'd better message her first or you will be denied for sure. Tell her you love 'Cub Speaks', because I know you do.

What I like about myspace is that people have taken a lot time putting together their pages and writing stuff in their myspace blogs - hours of entertainment for my lunch breaks at work - though I have resolved to try to read books during that time as well. I picked 'Legacy of Blood: A Comprehensive Guide to Slasher Movies' (Jim Harper) off of the shelf. It focuses on the slasher film, which it considers to be a cousin or product of the Italian giallo, and while the author wants to reserve the subject of giallos for another book, he does mention a bunch of connections between the types of films. So far I've read about the first wave of slashers, most of which I have tapes of.

I had three sites I wanted to put up links too, but only one is really important. I've been reading a blog
Church of the Nihilistic Goat and enjoying it very much. Rock journalism for fans of Angel Rot, Charles Manson, Wolf Eyes, and other bands and records that push the envelope. Plus it's funny, irreverent, and feels like it comes from the backwoods - Canada...

I had to talk to a Canadian customer for about 45 minutes yesterday. She looked a lot like fellow Canadian Alanis Morissette, but with the most indecisive, insecure, person I've ever dealt with in retail. It was seriously mind-numbing and launched me into a depression about my job that lasted into the early evening. I almost lost my shit, but managed to stay soft spoken and reassuring throughout the whole conversation. I just broke my no-blogging-about-work rule. Fuck. I'm fired.

Sunday, May 22, 2005

scenereport - costa mesa

I was walking home from work and I walked by what must have been a hardcore show at the Chinese restaurant. There were kids gathered out front, a girl working the door, vans parked out front, etc... Everyone was in black with that O.C. look, definitely a metalcore show. Some young kid in a wheelchair was there. I couldn't tell if there was something wrong with him or not. You can't tell just by looking at someone. He was there with a hardcore kid next to him, maybe a brother, I don't know, probably a good person and not someone who just gets paid to watch after him. Wheelchair Kid, preteen and dressed like a normal person (shorts and colored t-shirt), was babbling loudly to a bunch of really good looking fashionable kids on the curb, maybe just talking to everyone in his slurred voice, saying he was "an original metalhead" or something. A fascinating story I'm sure, but the scene kids sitting down seemed absolutely mortified that he was talking to them. They were turned away from him, looking only his way out of the corners of their eyes. Hey, maybe I'm misreading the situation, but it sure looked like he was not one of the crew. I did not stop to people watch or take in more of what was going on.

The most good looking stylish group you'll ever see and this wierdo was fucking it up, but making it obvious to me that some beauty is only skin deep.

I get uncomfortable around different people too. I have phobias, but I won't let them know it from now on. This situation, it just made me sick. Sexuality, affluence, hair styles, getting connected... Fuck hardcore kids.

Thursday, May 19, 2005

'got milk' - obscenity

I'm home from school with a bug. It makes me sleep and kills my stomach. I'm quick to blame food poisoning for any problem that I've got, but I can't think of anything suspect that I ate. In fact, I've had nothing but spaghetti and coffee for several days. Well at least I can work on my "To Do" list that is about a mile long.

There has been no time to review movies lately. No time to even watch movies. I'll be much happier when there is.

People seem generally displeased with my
Coachella pics. Cool.

No... I did get mostly positive feedback, but at least there was at least this bit on the buddyhead message board.

Wow - you mention the cobrasnake like 100 times. You even called him a "famous Hollywood photographer". That guy is a no-talent assclown douchebag. He doesn't do shit. You also mentioned something about the crowd being very punk rock, edgy, and fashion aware of something. Very lame. I hope the whole site is a joke.

If you are wondering what I'm doing on the buddyhead board, I'm looking for fun forums to promote my work, but having trouble finding any. The buddyhead board is pretty dead. Is all the action on myspace? Are all message boards dead? I will find out and tell you.

So I discovered that most people get to my blog through search engines, by like, twenty to one or something. My loyal readers are still the most important ones, but I'm excited by my discovery, thanks to StatCounter.

The search terms are the expected, like titles of the movies I review, animal rights stuff, punk top ten lists, even some scenester fashion queries... Some were more specific, like the locust is ruining hardcore for fat kids jessica hopper. Awesome, I did write about that. My favorite was pictures of a deformed vaginas. Yup, deformed vaginas has come up more than once by searchers. Can I help it if the movies I write about are perverse? No I can't.

I'm gonna redesign this site again soon, around the end of the month, and I'll bring you a Cub Speaks homepage with an interview.

America's Next Top Model ended the season in a way that pleased me. It's one of the only shows I watch besides the news networks. Unfortunately they did a 'Got Milk' print ad this season. Gross cum shots. I mean it, it's not just in my brain, that shit is dirty.

Milk is obscene... deformed vaginas in the horror flicks? I've got no problem with that.

Thursday, May 12, 2005

Coachella photo essay part 3

part 3 is up at sceneholocaust.com!

more Coachella:

Tyson has his reviews up on his
myspace page. They are in the blog section on the right. I'm in the stories a lot cause I spent 90% of the 3 days with him - so warren fans have to read that stuff.

here is
Coachee, a little statue, posing with performers and some celebs - who could easily afford tickets, but probably got a free ride just like they always do... can't blame them though.

Make Your Own Coachella Blog Post - not anything like mine

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

Coachella photo essay part 2

go over to sceneholocaust.com to see the next exciting installment of my Coachella photo essay.


my friend wrote about Coachella in her blog -
shootsofstars - I took funny pictures of her eating a tasty burrito, but did not put them in Coachella photo essay pt. 2, sorry everyone...

thebubbledeath has writing about the scene and a horror theme! I like it.

Monday, May 09, 2005

House of Wax (2005)

It's not Cabin Fever, but it's probably as good as Wrong Turn, a movie in the tradition of The Hills Have Eyes. No little kids making drawings, no ghosts, no big plot twists, thank God. It's aimed at teens, but without looking obvious like Cursed did a couple of months ago. I know I'm not supposed to review these new movies here, but I was very surprised by this one. It's got little resemblance to the Vincent Price original expect for a character being named "Vincent" in tribute. Lots of gore and not a lot of Paris Hilton, who degrades herself in this movie with a scene referencing her sex tape.

I bet this movie turns out to be better than Devil's Rejects. O.M.G., I did say that.

Sin City, I saw that one this week as well. Even though I don't like computer generated movies, I will admit that I enjoyed watching this film. What I don't get is how some people, like
bloody-disgusting.com, are giving this movie ten out of ten stars, putting it on the level with Kill Bill and The Godfather. I attribute some of this hysteria to the nerd factor. While I am a horror nerd who will buy a stack of empty Lighting Video boxes just to put in my stash and I own three copies of the same Media poster for Sleepaway Camp, I am by no means a comic nerd. I think what gets comic nerds off is saving the girl or getting revenge on whomever it is preying on the innocent, especially attractive girls. The more twisted the killer, the better, and in Sin City we have the ultimate example (spoiler) when the pedophile Yellow Bastard gets his penis ripped off by Bruce Willis. While I do want justice for scum bags in the real world and do believe that revenge is an attractive element in the film world, this scenario reminds me of fantasies I had as an adolescent before I'd ever had a girl friend. A bunch of hoods, with rape on their minds would approach the cute girl from my French class on the train. I'd pop out, like Casey Jones from Ninja Turtles and decapitate them all. A pathetic little fantasy? Absolutely. I still day dream, but getting a girlfriend is no longer a figment of my imagination. With that said, here is the Cub Speaks on House of Wax.

Cub, why did you want to call Child Services when you saw some theater goers coming up the aisle steps?

Those parents were shitty and do not deserve to have children. There needs to be some mastermind our there who can sterilize those ignorant fools so that they stop making littles that they can not even take care of. Who brings a two year old to see a violent horror movie, and even worse the idiotic mom does not even have the decency to step out of the theater when the child is bawling for more than half the movie. Sorry cub, I can talk about this for ever but it gets me worked up so I will stop.

One day Cub, I'm going to by you a house. You know I plan to instal a wax Chamber of Horrors in the basement. Is this cool with you?

Oh no horror chamber in the basement ;)

Next: Coachella pix, pt 2, I begin to talk shit...

Friday, May 06, 2005

Coachella photo essay part 1

The first part of my Coachella photo essay is done and posted on sceneholocaust.com where I now will be posting the image-heavy entries to this blog. I intend to always post here first so if you check this blog for new content you won't miss any shit.

The Coachella pics will be divided up three ways with each set being better than the previous. There is also a lot of commentary.

it's new...

Tuesday, May 03, 2005

reviewed by Blogg'd

I'm excited to say that this blog got reviewed by the brutal review site Blogg'd. The review mostly focuses on my most recent post on the killer fetus film, The Unborn.

check it out:

This blog claims to be the leading vegan horror fan site, which I guess you could say caters to a niche market (much in the same way mail order school girl panties for horny Japanese businessmen is a niche market). I assumed when I started reading the most recent post the blog would cover reviews for horror films but quickly discovered that the author must be suffering from a severe case of meat deprivation combined with acid flash backs. In said post, a review of The Unborn, what starts out as a glimpse into the mind of a person who would love to see a master race of fetuses tearing people apart and the desire to ogle deformed vaginas quickly turns into a monologue about why he became a vegan, his stance on abortion, and sex advice for guys who have never heard of birth control. Normally I can look past the bad grammar, poor spelling and crappy sentence structure in a blog but this guy in the same post claims to have parents that work in schools and higher education (I can only imagine that they hold the posts of lunch lady and janitor). After browsing through a few more posts and marveling at the kindergarten graphics the only use I could find for this site is as a visual aid in a presentation on the harmful effects of heavy drug use. I figure the best way to sum up this review and provide a bit of helpful advice to the author would be to quote him directly from one of his posts: "I've got two words for you... JERK OFF!"

Coming up next will be my photo essay on the Coachella Festival where you can see pictures of people who really are on drugs.