Monday, March 13, 2006

The Kiss (1988) "Fuck You Felix!" and great ebay rip-offs

I got my tapes today that I previously thought were never going to show. Man does media mail take a long time to get across the country - where were my tapes over the past month, being transported on the back of a donkey? The metal head vendor sent the package 25 days after I won. I believe him now. Up until a few days ago I was sure that these were not sent period and I reported him to ebay and wrote some nasty feedback. Then I remembered how slow media mail can be - let's discuss the issues...
My main complaint is that the seller wrote "US Postal Service First Class MailĀ® Estimated delivery 2-3 days" and then sent it through cheaper media mail. This has happened to me a bunch of times and is straight up dishonest. The seller saves a couple of dollars when they charge for the better service and then send it media mail. As a result the package ships up to 23 times slower than advertised, earning the seller a good chance at being submitted negative feedback. Is it worth it for them? I guess so, if the the buyer has a"all's well that ends well" attitude and gives the seller "A+++" feedback regardless of obscene delays. Maybe these slightly dishonest sellers don't deserve the "F-", but how about a "C---". No one wants to seem like a bastard, but from now on, how about taking a stand. Positive feedback is not a right.

I admit, I've been a puss in the past, not wanting to give another horror fan a bad rating. Well fuck that.

One thing that stops buyers from giving negative feedback is that the sellers often wait until they have received feedback before giving their feedback to the buyer. Sometimes they even explicitly mention this, to suggest, "fuck with me and I'll fuck with you". Well, this is ridiculous, feedback should be given to the buyer based on when they pay. The seller is already protected because they don't ship until getting paid. They should leave the buyer feedback based on when they got paid alone, not based on reciprocity.

Still, suppose you leave a douche seller some deserved bad feedback and then they get you back with some nonsense just for revenge. So what? As a buyer does your feedback matter? The buyer, not so much the seller, chooses who does business with who and that's how it stays. Negative feedback hurts the seller more. No doubt. Don't be intimated. Leave the feedback that should be left.

One more thing, before the horror review. Yup, more ebay. When I want to win on ebay and I really want to win, I bid during the last minute. Sometimes this is just not possible, due to work or school or dates with Cub. Then I decided what my maximum bid is, place it, and hope I get if for as little an amount as possible. Often, very often, when I win, the amount I'm paying is suspiciously close to my maximum. Suppose a box of tapes is going for $25. I'll be away from the computer until the auction is over so I plug in my maximum, say $50. I'll leave the computer winning the auction at around $26. When I get back the computer and find that I've won, I'm likely to be throwing down $49.98 for the tapes. It could be legit, someone could have gone up to $49 and not broke $50, but this happens so often that I figure buyers are getting fucked with by corrupt sellers once again. I asked a friend who is a full time seller. She assured me the sellers DO NOT know what their bidder's maximum bids are. Well thank God for that! So sellers ARE NOT logging in under a different name and bidding up to just below my maximum (after all they would not want to bid so high as to win their own item!) every time. All is well and it's an honest world... or is it?

Listen to what my seller friend told me:

The seller isnt shown what your maximum bid is. For a seller to bid on his/her own auction is called "shill" bidding and it is forbidden on Ebay. I know, 'cause I thought about doing it myself a long time ago, ahhaha! But I didn't ever do it 'cause I would be too chicken I that I would get caught (oh yeah, and its wrong! ;D ).

Anyway, most likely you are just getting bid up at the last minute by some other buyer. BUT it is technically possible for a seller to shill bid you.

The only way you could really tell is probably one of 3 ways:

1) check the bid history on the item. See if there are any "bid retractions". This would show that someone could have put in enough money to see how much YOU were willing to pay, and then canceled their OWN bid. Then they could bid again right UNDER your maximum bid.

2)This would be the pain in the ass way...Go to their feedback page. Click on the items they have sold, and check the bid histories there. Do you see a lot of the SAME bidders bidding (but not winning) in their other auctions? I.e. Is the seller using the same screen name to shill bid on his/her other auctions.

3)This way is probably waaaay too much trouble. Its the same as ..2 really, only check to see if there are Ebay name changes. If a Ebay member changes their name (maybe to avoid people noticing their shill bidding) then there will be a white circle icon next to their Ebay ID.

See, it's possible - and I'm not just paranoid, I know it has happened to me - and probably you!

The Kiss was directed by Pen Densham and it is your typical 80's fair. "Fuck You Felix!" is a line uttered by a supporting character as she bats a puppet cat-monster that has be a real murdering bastard throughout the movie. Yes, it is one of the lamest one-liners that I've ever heard. There's a lot of lame dialogue and plot elements here, but the movie is professionally made, with good FX, and novel deaths. Most fans genre fans will enjoy picking it to pieces, so with that said, watch it. The star, Joanna Pacula, is absolutely gorgeous. Let's see what Cub has to say.

You say the Polish star, Joanna Pacula, is prettier than Nastassja Kinski?! This is major, coming from Cub who loves Kinski so very much. Is it really true, is Pacula sooo beautiful? So is this more proof that Polish girls, like yourself, are number 1?

I know it is tough choice because I have always loved and still do love Kinski, however, I do think that Joanna Pacula is a tad bit prettier (although it is damn close between the two of them). Pacula is gorgeous. She is one of the most beautiful women I have ever seen. So yes, cub, I guess that goes to prove that Polish women are the best! Viva la Polska!!!

What was with the end - total bullshit. -Spoiler- Alien snake creature is in the pool. Girl gets pulled out just before snake creature is about to go down her throat. Snake slithers in the burning water. Girl falls back in pool with as audience groans at stupidity. Pool explodes. Where is girl? Father looks frantically, she has vanished. Oh, there she is... off camera she got out of the pool again and is safe. Yay.

The end was totally crazy and it simply did not flow. One second you see her in the pool and it gets blown up (she should have been thrown in the air), the next second she is being shielded by her friend. How does that happen?

There must be an alternate ending to this that has a final shot showing that the creature has transferred into her... right Cub?

I agree with you that the creature should have been in her at the end, for The Kiss II*. Cub you are also Polish, we will have a beautiful Polish family (Buns says he's Polish too!)

*I feel the need to clarify, The Kiss II does not exist!


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